Writer's Sludge

I haven't written one word - save for blog posts, FB and Twitter updates, and the occasional short email - in three weeks.

Writer's block, you ask?

Not exactly.

More like Writer's Sludge.

I'm editing. I'm actually in the easy stage of editing, where all the major changes have been made and the end is in sight. I should be able to tackle this no problem, right?

Unfortunately, editing is also the tricky stage, when I need to focus all my attention on the task before me. Which means I can't do it during the day, when the kids need me. Even putting on a movie doesn't help (yes, I do resort to that sometimes - I never claimed to be Supermom), because I'm still in "mom" mode, not "writer" mode.

Up until the plague sweeping our house, I had been getting to the library for an hour on Fridays after Carl got home, and even that one hour of writing a week was fantastic. But with at least one of us being sick for almost the entire month of February, that just stopped happening.

Editing in the evenings, after the kids are in bed, you suggest? Yes. I should do that. I often have grand plans throughout the day of doing that. But usually by the time 8:00 rolls around and the kids are asleep, all I can do is curl up in the recliner and read fluffy books. My plans of a winter spent delving into different mythologies has fallen through, too! I've fallen back on comfort reads, Agatha Christie and Patricia C Wrede and Miss Read. All good books, but none of which require me to stretch my brain.

Which means, of course, that even now that we're all (rap wood) healthy again, and I could be working on the MS again, my creative muscles have fallen out of use, and my natural laziness is creeping back to the forefront of my personality, instead of locked tightly in the back, where I usually try to keep it contained.

So I write this blog post in hopes that by being honest and open about this, it will trigger something in me, maybe even that famous stubbornness and contrariness that I'm known for throughout my family and friends, and I'll start writing again immediately after posting this.

Even though I haven't been writing/editing, I have started exercising some of my creative muscles again recently. See?

Now I just need to translate that into writing! Hmm ... maybe if Maia had to deal with pirates ...

Moving Right Along

Three of three!

I'm cruising through these edits. Short stories go so much faster than novels! Even the Olympics haven't been enough to slow me down - though granted, much of what they're showing right now doesn't interest me greatly. If it weren't the Olympics, I would never voluntarily watch any sort of volleyball, beach or court. Water polo isn't high on my list of favorite sports to watch, either.

I do, however, find myself on the edge of my seat for every. single. rowing. event. Seriously, I start out watching casually, and the next thing I know, I'm holding my breath, clutching my hands together, making little inarticulate squeaks every time positions change at all. Not much editing happening during those (also, it's ridiculous how happy I am to hear Terry Gannon commentate on all the rowing events. I grew up listening to Terry Gannon, Dick Button, and Peggy Fleming commentate on all ABC's figure skating events, and every time I hear any one of them now it just brings back my happy teen years).

Carl and I enjoy watching the gymnastics together, and oohing and gasping over it all. We are in full agreement that having either one of our littles take up competitive gymnastics would put us in early graves. Any other sport, I think, would be fine, but gymnastics makes me sweat.

Anyway. Back to the editing. The nice thing, I'm finding, about editing so many short stories in a row is that it is much easier to see my repeated problem motifs and correct them than it is in a novel. I'm not exactly sure why that is, but that's how it works for me. I am starting to see and correct some of those problems myself now, even before the CPs have pointed it out, and that's definitely a good thing.

Two more stories to be critiqued and edited, and then I send the whole shebang off to my copyeditor. I hate to sound like a broken record in all my posts here - but I'm excited.

I'm taking today off - spending the day with some college friends, including one who now lives down south and only makes it back to the area once a year. Eleven kids under the age of six and five adults - yikes!

I'm pretty sure it won't just be the kids running around like chickens with their heads chopped off.

Tomorrow will be getting those last two stories in good enough shape for CPs to look at them. Things are most definitely progressing!

Edits and Quilts

My week off is done! I started editing yesterday, in between watching the Olympics and grumbling over NBC's terrible coverage. I keep telling myself to be thankful we can watch any of the events at all, but somehow I keep finding myself on Twitter, complaining again. Then I virtuously tell myself that if enough of us complain publicly, NBC will have to take note and make changes before Sochi, and therefore I am doing America in general a service.

As Jane Austen says, "how quick come the reasons for approving what we like."

I'm actually quite pleased with the way the edits are coming along. One story in particular needs a lot of work, but the other two are fairly smooth sailing. Which is good, because as soon as these three are ready to send to my copy-editor, I'll have two more ready for critiquing and then editing.

I'm still trying to figure out the cover design. Do I hire someone to do that for me, or do I handle it myself? I'm not too shabby of a photographer, and I actually have a very clear idea of what I want for the cover, but the problem is in finding a model, and then handling all the editing aspect of it. I don't have Photoshop, and iPhoto (and even PicMonkey) is very limited! Any advice, already-published writers out there?

Even with the shoddy coverage from NBC, the Olympics are definitely inspiring me. If these athletes can do everything that they can, do that huge push to fulfill a lifelong dream ... then I can figure out all these nit-picky details to take that first step on the road of my lifelong dream.

And, as is usual with me, my brain is already teeming with ideas for new projects. Three connected novellas! Two similar-themed but not-really-connected novelettes! A collection of fantasy stories and artwork from other unpublished/new writers/artists organized by me! And, oh yeah, my novels. Can't forget those.

I don't really mind having so many creative plots at my fingertips. Even if I only accomplish half of them, that's still pretty major.

In the meantime, I am holding myself sternly on the task at hand before I let myself get carried away with new projects.

(Grace's sunshine quilt is coming along nicely, by the way. I sit down to watch the Olympics and just start tying, and before I know it, I've got several blocks done. I might actually have it finished by the end of the Olympics at this rate! Here's a picture of it in its pinned state - the lighting doesn't do it justice at all, but you still can get an idea of how cute it is.)

You can see why we call it the sunshine quilt!

Finished! (Well, Sorta)

Monday evening right before dinner, I typed the last words to my final short story planned for this summer. I still have plenty (PLENTY) of editing to do on all five stories and the novella, but the actual creating part is done.

So weird this morning not to open up a document on my computer as soon as I got up.

I'm not going to write anything (except blog posts and Twitter/FB updates, naturally) for the rest of this week. Give it all a chance to simmer. Clean my poor neglected house. Make bread. Finish organizing the school supplies for this fall.

I'm making a good start on cleaning up other projects already - I have the main body of Grace's sunshine quilt all sewn and almost all the borders on. After that, it's a simple matter of assembling, tying, and binding (which will still take a long time, but not as long as the putting together of the quilt top itself).

I was nervous about setting myself such a definite goal and project for this summer - a collection of short stories and/or a novella to indie publish this fall. And it's definitely stretched me, and I definitely will never again set myself such a tight time frame for a relatively major project while my kids are still little, but it's also been great. I've proven to myself that I CAN do this, I can accomplish something when I set my mind to it, I don't always have to be the person who loses heart partway through.

Granted, there's still a great deal to do. I have a copy-editor, but I still need to figure out cover design and formatting, along with the aforementioned edits.

But the end is in sight. I see the light at the end of the tunnel. I have confidence that I'm going to get there, and confidence is half the battle, right?

The other tremendously important thing I've learned this summer is that, while making writing my career is so vital to me, it's not worth family. Honestly, that's said so often that it's completely cliche, but I've never been entirely certain of its veracity before. Not until I actually had to make the choice every day: kids/husband or writing? The times I chose the family I do not regret at all, and the times I chose writing ... well, sometimes taking a break from my family WAS needful for my sanity (hey, just trying to be completely transparent here), but mostly, I have learned that spending time with my family over my writing will always be the choice that leaves me the most satisfied. And it was good to have the opportunity to learn that for myself, instead of wistfully looking at my piles of unfinished writing projects and suspecting that all those writers that talk about family over writing are just blowing hot air.

My next writing project, after I've published these stories, will be to polish up Magic & Mayhem (I have GOT to think of a better title) over the fall and winter, with the loosely-held goal of indie publishing that in Spring 2013. And maybe a few other sneaky side projects along the way - I've discovered that short stories can be rather fun.

I'm sure I'll have plenty other thoughts throughout the rest of the summer on what I've learned from this particular writing project, so stay tuned.

If I'm very diligent, I'll even be able to post pictures of the sunshine quilt before fall, too.

We'll see!

Joy's quilt - we're using the same nine-patch pattern for Grace's, but with yellows instead of pinks. They are going to look SO ADORABLE side-by-side in the littles' room once it's all finished!

Lists, Part the Fifth

Holy month of no rain, Batman! Though we're way better off here than in many parts of the country (I get more excited when I hear about rain predicted for the midwest and west than I even do for it here), we're still definitely ready to see a break in the dry spell. The farmers are in agony.

When you all need a break from the rain dances you'll be doing in your back yards, I've found some fun links for you to peruse. Just because I care!

1. This post is from March, but the message is timeless. Love it.
2. I had some serious self-confidence issues in my life as a result of being told I was nothing special as a kid, but I agree that we've gone way overboard in the other direction at this point in time, and this article was a great take on it, I thought.
3. I found this quote on an old blog post from MY old personal blog (don't bother reading most of the other posts; they're very navel-gazing), and was reminded that I still love it. Truth and wisdom, right there!
4. This book review made me want to re-read Fly by Night. A book about the power of words - the sort of thing I dream of someday writing when my craft is more honed than it is right now!
5. When hunting for fresh bedtime reading for my littles, I came across this list. Very helpful.
6. This was just about the most exciting thing I've seen in ages. Back to Star Wars basics? YES PLEASE. And then this article, too, which gives a bit more insight into Leia's role? YESYESYESYES. All my Star Wars nerdiness rising back to the surface.

It is breaking my heart not to be at Comic-Con this weekend (maybe next year!!!) (Yeah right), but I'm trying to distract myself by working hard on short story edits, more short story outlines (my goal is to be able to publish five in a collection, and one more as a bonus companion to my seperately-published novella), working on Grace's quilt, and trying not to get overheated outside while my kids play in the kiddie pool. Oh yes, and editing the photos from my MIL's wedding, because they're not going to get any less intimidating over time.

I hope your weekend is full of bliss!

A Bird's-Eye Look at Editing

Easter is over, the eggs are hunted, the family has gone back to their respective houses, the fridge is chock full of ham and sundries, the coffee/tea stash is seriously depleted, and it's time to start thinking about editing again.

I have adopted a methodical practice for editing this particular MS. First, I printed out the rough draft, and went through it with a pencil, marking specific changes as well as leaving just general comments like "awkward phrasing; fix it," or "this whole passage sucks; change it," or if I was feeling kindly toward myself "insert more about specific reasons here."

Next stage is the one I'm in now, putting the suggested changes into the document.

The next stage is the one I'm dreading, and the reason I read Line by Line: copy-editing. This is the mind-numbing part where I go through and look critically at each line, pulling it apart to see if it is as concise (in case you haven't gathered as much from my blog posts, I'm a rambly writer), understandable, and lovely as possible.

Then will come one final look-through, and then I will send it out to my beta readers. Assuming I have beta readers at that point, that is. Anyone want to volunteer for that? I'm always happy to read others' work in exchange. (and yes, I know it's not considered etiquette to beg for betas in this way. What can I say, I've been looking for a critique group for over a year now with no luck, and I'm desperate. Also, my tongue is rather in my cheek, though that doesn't mean I'd refuse if anyone offered to become a critique partner with me!)

After the betas tear it apart and send it back and I stop sobbing into my pillow over all their suggested improvements, I'll go through it again, fixing the problems they saw in it. Then I send it back to them, and then we decide if it's good to go out for submission, or if it needs yet more work.

It's a fairly exhaustive (and exhausting) process, and it's more intensive than I've ever attempted with any of my other finished MSS. However, of those, one was never meant for publication, but was simply finished as "my first finished novel;" one is languishing in a closed file; and one I've ended up tearing apart, breaking down, and starting it again from scratch. So I'm thinking that a more severe editing process might, in fact, be helpful for me. And after reading on Shannon Hale's blog that some of her works go through nine drafts, I really don't feel this is too over-the-top.

I'm planning on this taking a long time. I'd been feeling an almost panicked need to get this MS done, to get it out there as quickly as possible so that by the time Carl was ready to go back to school I could maybe, possibly, be helping the family finances. However, by working so hard and feeling so rushed, I was losing a lot of the joy that characterized the first writing of this story in the first place, and more importantly, was finding it harder and harder to enjoy being with my family, because every moment spent with them was a moment I wasn't writing.

Um, bad priorities.

So I've accepted that for right now, my role is not to assist in bringing in any extra money when Carl is in school, at least not through my writing. Depending on his schedule, I can always go back to retail - after eight years before my marriage, I'm pretty comfortable there - once he's in school, and help out that way. Right now, I'm going to slow down the frenetic pace I'd been applying to the writing, enjoy it, enjoy my family, enjoy life as it is right now, and take as long as I need to in order to make this story as close to perfect as I can, while still savoring being mumsie to my two little chickadees.

What does your editing process look like?

Not Much

I have been editing my ms and also reading Line-by-Line so that when I've finished with content edit I can go through and do a technical edit. This is all contributing to make my writing as tight as it can be, but it also seems to be drying up my fount of creative inspiration. Every time I go to write a blog post, my brain starts screaming at me to check a million tiny things to make sure I'm not committing any egregious technical sins. Which would, no doubt, make my blog posts much better, but also happens to take more effort than I have to give to a blog. Shockingly lax, I know, but if I'm going to have a blog at all, it has to be (mostly) unedited, otherwise it is too much time away from story-writing and other life necessities, such as preparing food, folding laundry, making beds, and other tremendously exciting duties.

It doesn't help that I've been working to stave off a nasty cold since last weekend (I've drunk GALLONS of rosehip tea, which is one of the tastier ways of getting Vitamin C), and on Thursday Carl came home from work and said "We're going up to your parents' tomorrow for the weekend because I have bridge inspections in that and nearby counties!" So, less time for blogging, while at the same time my brain is singularly devoid of any interesting topics.

Which lets me put this back on you - what are topics you would like to see me cover on this blog? They can be writing or non, whichever interests you. Let me know in the comments, and hopefully some of them will stir my sluggish blogging brain into life!

Blue February

I haven't had much chance to think about blogging lately. Between a trip out to Massachusetts to visit Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary (Carl had been thinking Wheaton or Trinity, but after visiting GCTS, we're pretty sure it's Boston, not Chicago, for us in the next year), sick children, an online defensive driving course to cut our insurance costs, and trying NOT to think about my 30th birthday coming up in less than a month* ...

My head's been whirling. Oh, and I started editing the 1920s adventure-fantasy (that story is in desperate need of a title). Y'know, in my spare time. Which might explain why I'm only crawling through the editing process.

And in the midst of sickness, the littles have been impossibly cranky this month - this week especially they've had me tearing at my hair. Which proves to me that no matter how mild the winter, by the time February rolls around, we're all more than ready for spring. I recognize this crabbiness - it's the winter blues for sure. Joy buried her head in my chest this morning after getting up and refused to open her eyes or mouth for an hour straight, nodding her head when asked if she was sad and shaking it when I asked if she knew why. She's better now, but she still has no idea why she was so miserable this morning. A little while ago Gracie sprawled full length on the hall floor upstairs and gave herself over to wailing, again, for no reason. Winter blues indeed!

Right now the littles are having hot chocolate and I made myself extra-strong coffee; we will attempt kindergarten with Joy and give Gracie her alphabet flash cards to play with later; then they will play in the bathtub longer than they need to get clean; this afternoon I will let them watch their Beatrix Potter video while I attempt to get some writing or editing done - Mummy needs to tend her own needs as well as everyone else's, after all.

How is your February going? Has it been a happy winter for you, or are you ready for spring, too? Do you garden? I'm hoping to start a container garden this year for some veggies and herbs - tomatoes, lettuce, and peppers; thyme, basil, and marjoram. Yum!

*I'm really not freaking out about 30 - 29 was actually a lot harder for me to come to grips with - but it's still a big milestone, and I don't really have time to think about it with everything else right now, so instead I'll just wait until two weeks before and then start thinking about nothing else. Carl, if you're reading this - small birthday gifts every day from March 1st to 14th are perfectly acceptable.

My Story, My Child

Last night I printed out the first draft of my older-young-adult historical-adventure-fantasy (seriously, don't you think I could pick one genre sometime?) so that I can look at it in physical form and mark it up for the changes I want in the second draft.

As page after page (151 single-spaced, to be exact - oy) flew from the printer, I looked at them and shook my head.

This would be so much easier if it was a collaboration, I thought. I could hand off this draft and the few notes I've already sketched out for needed changes to my writing partner, and sit back and let him or her do this next step. Then I could just polish up his/her work for the next draft!


But even as I thought it, I shook my head. Nope. Not my way. This story is my baby, mineminemine. And while there have been times when I've wished I could hand my kids off to someone, like my parents, for a few years and get them back when they are, say, eight or nine, I always knew in my heart that if a fairy godmother waved her wand and gave me that chance, I wouldn't take it. Even though my parents might do a better job, having had more experience, I still need and want to do the raising myself. It's hard work, and not fun a lot of the time, but the reward is so much greater at the end.

And so it is with my stories. The editing process might not be a lot of fun always, and it is loads more work than getting the initial idea down on paper (or computer), but even if I had the chance, I wouldn't hand it off to someone else to do. For better or for worse, this is my story. Someone else might write it better, but in the end, I am the one who has to tell it, in my own way.

Someday I might do a collaboration project with another writer. And if that happens, I am sure it will be its own uniquely rewarding experience. But for now, for this ms at least, I have to go it alone.

Just as knowing that even if I had the chance I wouldn't let someone else raise my kids (though seriously, if we lived close enough, I would NOT mind at all letting Mom and Dad watch them once a week - could I call them my beta parents?) is part of what makes me a parent, so knowing that this is my story, to tell in my own words, even with all the work involved, is part of what makes me a writer.

The Secret

I have discovered a secret!

Want to hear it?

It's a good one.

It is ...

How to give your ego a healthy deflating.

What is this trick?

Give your work to someone else - someone honest - to critique.

I sent a couple of short stories to a writer friend yesterday. She sent the first one back covered in notes. Now notice - I am THANKFUL that she did that. So very, very thankful for a true assessment that was also gracious. Because how will I ever improve if I don't know where I'm falling short? And how can I ever hope to get published if my writing is not as tight and clean as possible? So thank you, Andrea, for your meticulous and honest assessment (and also for the kind words at the start about what you liked!). And thank you also for pricking my ego (not that you yourself pricked it - seeing the amount of work still required on something I thought fairly tight pricked it. Just to be clear.).

You see, it's been a little while since I've had anything fit to send to anyone for critiquing. And in that time, I'd been starting to feel pretty good - even safe - about my writing.

I'm not saying I'm suddenly thinking I'm not a good writer - but that I didn't even realize how complacent I was getting about my writing until someone else looked at it.

Self-esteem = good. Complacency = bad.

I know I am a good writer. I also know I can be a better writer. It was that latter part that, without me realizing it, had been starting to slip. And it took a 3000-word story covered in honest (and for the most part very basic grammar and phrasing) corrections to jolt me out of that and remind me that hey, this is real work, lady, and writing cleanly is just as important as creating compelling characters.

So, that is my self-discovery for the week. Now if you'll excuse me, I have some editing to do.

Thanksgiving Update

I wasn't going to post on Thanksgiving, but ...

In between making pie crust and preparing the pie filling, I sat down for a bit (Carl was slicing the apples for me, so I wasn't just slacking), and ended up finishing the final revisions to my picture book MS. The final draft has been sent to the illustrator, who will start work on it after Christmas.

I am so excited!

And now I get to go put together an apple pie. Yesterday I made my first-ever french silk pie and a dutch apple pie, so this is my last one for the holiday. My baby is napping, and the bigger one is helping her Oma in the kitchen. Snowy landscape outside, peaceful house inside.

I hope you, in America, are having a wonderful Thanksgiving, and you, in other countries, are simply having a marvelous Thursday.

Much joy to you all!

YA, Or Not

As I was working on my 1920s WIP the other day, I realized something important.

This is not a YA story.

The heroine and the hero, you see, have already come of age. Yes, the heroine is nineteen, but she is fully self-aware. The hero is in his mid-twenties. Both have lived through the War, both came of age during that time. This story is more about moving from young adult to fully adult, in the heroine's case, and in the hero's case - again, he's already adult, and he is more learning just some good, healthy life lessons (like, don't underestimate women - particularly one woman in particular!).

So. This puts me in a quandary. Either I make some major changes - changes that would alter the entire story (set it before the War, when they are younger? Make the house party one hosted and attended by parental figures, instead of heroine's personal friends? Keep it after the War and just have them live through it, instead of being personally involved? Somehow this is starting to sound like Muppet Babies or the like - take characters already established and just drop them in age) (did I seriously just make a Muppet Babies reference in this post?), OR I drop the entire idea of YA and just accept that this is an alternate-history adventure-fantasy, end thought.

I'm leaning toward the latter. Except I'm starting to panic, because everything that I've looked up in reference to agents and marketing etc has been YA. Are there other stories like this out there? Is there even a genre for alternate-history adventure-fantasy? (Outlander? I've never read any of the stories, but I have a vague idea those are somewhat similar) Do I go for the fantasy genre or the adventure/mystery genre? Do I cut out the fantasy along with the YA and just have it be a historical adventure?

So many questions. One of these days I'm going to write something uncomplicated.

How boring will that be!

Have you ever gotten halfway through a project and realized it's not what you had originally planned? Which is more important to you, sticking within your genre or sticking with your characters and plot? Do you think an alternate-history adventure-fantasy would have a market in the adult crowd? Did you watch Muppet Babies as a kid?

The Vote Is In!

You guys came up with some terrific suggestions and points to consider! Between your votes and what people came up with on Facebook, Catrin and Elin were definitely the favorites for the girls, and the vote was fairly evenly split between Wynn and Gethin.

In the end, I settled on ...

Catrin for the protag! One of the biggest selling points for me for this name, which I didn't even mention on here, is that the nickname is Cadi, which I kind of love even in real life. So she is Catrin for formal occasions, Cadi everywhere else. The simplicity of it also works well for her character, I think.

Wynn for the main love interest. I hesitated a bit on this one. Some of you mentioned the concern that it sounded more like a girl's name, which troubled me as well, but in the end, I just really, really liked it for him. Sometimes you've just got to go with your gut!

And Elin for the victim/bad guy. Aside from all the other good points for this name, it is only one letter less than her original name of Elain, which makes changing it in the MS nice and simple. Never let it be said I'm not honest with you all!

So now that the fun stuff is out of the way, I just need to work on finishing the first draft of this beast, and then deciding on a title. Which will be decidedly less than fun. Titles are not my forte.

Thanks again for all your input! It was a huge help.

Query, Revised

Thank you all so much for your words of advice and encouragement. Here, without further ado, is the revised text of The Query:

Dear Agent,

Nobody expected Tesni of Glynbach to be the one to rescue her younger sister from the evil witch - not even Tesni herself. As the eldest of three sisters, born in a land where nobody stepped outside fairy-tale convention, Tesni was supposed to hate Elain, not want to save her. But when weak-chinned Prince Aled cannot rescue his true love, it is Tesni who defies tradition and travels across the land to fulfill the witch’s five impossible tasks. With a few stalwart friends by her side, Tesni quests to collect each of the demanded magical items, seeing much that surprises her, and learning some important truths about herself. In the end, she must decide if love for her sister is enough to make the greatest sacrifice of all - to leave her home and family forever. Can happily-ever-after happen even to an Eldest-of-Three?

The Eldest Sister is my 70,000 word young adult fantasy novel. With a strong and conflicted female protagonist and a plot which highlights sacrifice and undeserved grace, The Eldest Sister is likely to appeal to readers of such authors as Lloyd Alexander, Shannon Hale, and Robin McKinley.

I have had two award-winning short stories and two poems published in the 2003 edition of Grasse Roots, the State University of New York at Canton’s literary magazine.

Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely,

Louise Ayers

Better, yes or no? Personally, I think it's not only more interesting, but carries more of my authentic "voice," rather than being dull and formal. Does it make you want to read the story?

ETA: Apparently one or two people have tried to leave a comment, but nothing has shown up yet. If you've tried, I didn't delete it! Maybe Blogger just has a bug? Anyway, hopefully if you try again, the comments will go through this time.

Query Help!

Yesterday I got the quickest rejection ever - half an hour after I sent the query (including the first five pages, as per the submission guidelines), the agent sent me a rejection. Half an hour. Did she even read it?

So, one of my good friends suggested posting my query letter up on my blog, so you, my other writerly friends, could cast a glance over it and tell me what egregious errors I've committed to receive so many, and such quick, rejections.

Just ... be gentle in your critique, please? I'm feeling a little sensitive about my writing right now

Dear [Agent],

In a land of fairy-tale conventions, Tesni has never quite fit. As an Eldest-Sister-of-Three, she can’t bring herself to hate her rabbity youngest sister Elain, nor does she have any desire to marry the sniveling Prince Aled. She plays her part dutifully, even knowing that she will be banished or killed for it in the end, for her love for family and home outweighs her desire for her own happy ending. When plans go awry, Tesni breaks tradition to embark on a dangerous and possibly deadly quest for Elain’s freedom. From the depths of the Underworld to the magical Fair Folk realm, the journey causes her to learn who she truly is. 

How Tesni realizes that there are worse things than death, and decides if she is willing to make the ultimate sacrifice for her sister’s happiness, furnishes the story line in my 70,000 word young adult fantasy The Eldest Sister. Featuring a strong and conflicted female protagonist and a plot which layers themes of sacrifice and undeserved grace under its playful premise, The Eldest Sister is likely to appeal to readers of such authors as Lloyd Alexander, Shannon Hale, and Robin McKinley.

I attended the State University of NY at Canton, and the State University of NY at Potsdam from 2002-2004, and I have had two short stories and two poems published in Grasse Roots, SUNY Canton’s literary magazine.

Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely,

Louise Bates

There you are, friends. Have at it (gently).

Query Lethargy

I've reached that inevitable point in my querying where I start to doubt - well, everything.

Will I ever find an agent/publisher?


Is something wrong with my query letter, even though I've polished it a hundred times?


Is my style of writing just not what people are looking for these days?


Am I even a decent writer after all?


I don't think these questions are necessarily bad - so long as I don't let them paralyze me. It's not a bad thing to tighten up the query letter for the hundredth and first time. It's probably a good thing to look at the MS again with a critical eye.

It's not a good thing to give up. It's not a good thing to let a defeatist attitude rule.

There is a good chance that The Eldest Sister isn't what agents, publishers, or readers are wanting right now. That's okay. This was the third and best MS I've completed thus far. And if it's not publishable, it's still an accomplishment. I will work on making Starsong even better, and if that gets published, then maybe someday I can go back to The Eldest Sister and re-work it, make it better, and get that published as well.

Or maybe, just maybe, I just haven't found the right agent yet. Maybe the next one on my list is the one who will want it. Maybe the final one on my list is the one who will take it. If I convince myself that it's no good, I'll never find out, will I?

So I'll keep trusting to the story, keep sending out those queries, and in the meantime, keep working to constantly improve my writing.

As tempting as it might be to quit, rather than keep seeing those rejection letters, that just isn't an option.

Not for me.

Fanfiction vs. original writing

I am nearing the end of yet another fanfiction story. This one, The Summer Between, is considerably shorter than most of my recent full-length works, and would probably fall somewhere between novella and novel (it should finish out at a little over 40,000 words). I could have padded it out, brought it up to at least 50,000, and if I ever go back and edit it, I might do just that, but for now, this is the story that wanted telling, so I'm not messing with it too much.

Fanfiction (also known as derivative fiction), for me, is a completely different writing process than original fiction. I don't do a tremendous amount of pre-research, preferring to look things up as I go along. I don't need to do much world-building, since I am playing in a world someone else has already established. Neither do I do a great deal of editing: no first, second, or third drafts. Once I have about four or five chapters written to my satisfaction (and this is the part that takes the longest), I start publishing. I try to always maintain that distance between what is written and what is published, about four to five chapters. That gives me the chance to go back and change something, within reason, without having to take down a published chapter and "fix" it.

So each chapter might get some individual editing, but as a whole, the story's first draft is the final draft. This makes for a less polished final product, certainly, but it also allows me to get the entire story up before my audience has tired completely of it. It's also a good exercise, for me, in getting things as right as possible the first time. I know many writers believe that the first draft should be sloppy and unkempt, but for me, it works much better to make my first draft as tight as possible, and just get it tighter and better with each succeeding draft. That's my own personal style, and fanfiction has definitely helped me hone that.

Since starting to write fanfiction, about six years ago now, I have written eight full-length or nearly full-length novels, seventeen shorter pieces, and started two Jane Austen pieces, both of which are unfinished, both of which I hope to finish eventually, neither of which I am certain when that will get done.

More important than the amount of fic has been the improvement to my writing abilities, and the friendships I have made through this community. It has been a wonderful way to meet other writing friends, and to both encourage and be encouraged along this journey.