Critiques and Connections

I had a lovely long phone conversation with my dear friend Laura two evenings ago (while taping up our tattered board books so they can last another couple years, hopefully), talking about, among other things, writing. Laura does technical writing for her job, and enjoys fiction on the side, while I can't imagine ever attempting any kind of technical writing. However, our interests and experience blend enough that talking with her always leaves me eager to get to work on whatever project I currently have going as soon as we're off the phone (which admittedly doesn't often happen, because usually we talk so long that I go to bed as soon as we're done).

Which, in turn, led me to thinking about the importance of having at least one person to bounce ideas, rough drafts, plots, dilemmas, et cetera off of. I have often heard of the importance of joining a critique group, and I think that is marvelous, if you have the option, but even if you can't find a good critique group, at least have one person you can use as a sounding board.

Unfortunately, I'm preaching at myself mostly here, because my options for sounding boards are: Laura, with whom I talk (sadly) only once in a blue moon; Carl (my husband), who is always willing to listen, but whose interests lie more in theology and philosophy, and so doesn't have much experience regarding fiction (especially YA fantasy); my mother, who loves to talk about research, but is so immersed in her own studies that we rarely get a chance to do more than just share with each other our current projects; and my father, who is the most encouraging person I know but has the delightful habit of thinking everything I write is wonderful.

Put all together, and I end up having a fairly broad base, but it's not quite the same as having one person (or more) serve as a knowledgable, critical judge. Not to mention that all of the above, save perhaps for my husband, always err on the side of kindness, which is lovely but not always helpful for preparing for the harsh reality of attempting to get published (Carl has always believed that truth is kinder than a false statement, which is why I have always, even before we were married, been able to rely on him for an honest opinion).

One of my goals through blogging, Twitter, and other social media is to start making connections with other writers, and hopefully eventually meet some people who will act as a good sounding board, and for whom I can do the same.

Are you part of a critique group? Do you know of any good online groups to join? Do you have one person whose judgement you trust enough to submit your works to, or do you have to spread it out over a disparate group of friends and family, like I do? Do you find your friends and family to be too kind when it comes to your work, or are they able to put aside personal feelings and be objective? Have you made good connections through blogging and social media, or is this more a shot in the dark?